If I Had a Million Dollars

Think about it. What would you do if you had a million dollars? How drastically would it change your life? Would you quit your job? Morph into a different person? Develop expensive tastes?

I can't immediately answer all these questions, but I can give you three absolutes: I would buy my dad a boat, I would hunt down and purchase the Addams Family pinball game for my mom, and I would continue shopping at Value City. Because basically, a trip to Value City is a priceless experience and I assume that even as a millionaire, I wouldn't stop having fun. Snobs just don't know what they're missing. Here's an example of something I saw while shopping there earlier this week:

African Blow Dart Recall - Not a Child's Toy! Please Return to Store Immediately!

Seriously, where else are you going to see an African Blow Dart recall? The flyer even explained how it had been sold as a child's toy, but it in fact, was a fully functional blow dart. How does the buyer for Value City make that type of mistake? Amazing. Priceless. Hilarious.

I will never stop shopping at the VC--I'll just stick to my rules of no toys (see blow dart example), no off-brand electronics (fire hazard) and no Christmas or birthday shopping there (see blow dart example). I don't want to be responsible for any of my nephews shooting up their neighborhood friends with the brand new blow dart Aunt Mo Mo gave them.